The same situation can be perceived very differently by different people. With feedback, you get to know others' perspectives and get a differentiated picture of the situation.
To recognise this differentiated picture of the situation, here are some suggestions to follow when providing feedback:
- Give specific and observable examples. The person with an opposite view to you might not get the whole picture if you are too vague.
- Send egocentric messages and describe your view. Egocentric messages convey that one's perception is subjective and gives the other person the opportunity to accept or reject the criticism. “I-messages” don't attack the other person.
- Be honest and say what you think. Only honest feedback promotes positive development.
- Describe your feelings and explain what concrete situations triggered you. Your team members get the chance to know what's going on inside you and can also understand your behaviour.
- Formulate wishes and describe the needs so that team members can hear what's important to them and where they want to go.
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